Joe Apology

That I Don't Even Know Why

2009-11-29T23:28:00.000-05:00

Dear self,
I'm sorry that nobody wants to go out with you, and that you're 16 and never had a boyfriend or been kissed. But I'm even more sorry that I don't even know why.

My Own Weird Little World

2009-11-24T23:27:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry I live in my own weird little world. I'm sorry I don't let people in properly. The more I travel the more I am me. It's just that there's a lot going on up there. So it's easier to talk about everything else. Or nothing at all.

I'm sorry to every boy I have ever liked but never told. You shaped me.But it has taken me 20 years to realise that I was a catch. I still am. So were some of you. But I should not feel weak to you. I should be strong. That being said, Red Head, I would drop a lot of things for you.

Rejection is My Biggest Fear

2009-11-22T23:26:00.001-05:00

i'm sorry that i cant help but keep my mouth shut because i'd rather cry tomorrow and not today. i'm sorry that i don't treat 'my being' with the respect it deserves. i'm sorry that rejection is my biggest fear :(

For Acting the Way I Act

2009-11-22T23:26:00.000-05:00

Im sorry for acting the way i act. I honestly didnt ever mean to hurt you if i did. I never meant for any fo this to ever happen. I hate myself for making you feel as if you are not wanted. You are my friend and i love you. I never wanted to hurt you in any way and if you let me talk to you, you will understand. Please don't be mad at me.

I Guess Love is Truly Blind

2009-11-17T23:06:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry that I'm not coming to your wedding.

It's just that I really hate him and I don't want to witness the moment when he becomes a part of all of our lives. I am mostly sorry that you can't see what you are involving yourself with. I guess love is truly blind.

You Make My Heart Flutter

2009-11-16T23:05:00.000-05:00

I'm so sorry sweetheart. I didn't mean to hurt you or say the things I did. It's so hard to be so far away from you and not be able to help. I understand you wanting your space and time. I want you to know that I sincerely love and trust you with all my heart and know you will figure things out the best way you can. I'm sorry I doubted you and let my wrongful lack of faith in you show. You make me feel special everyday. you make my heart flutter when you talk of our future together. I want nothing more than to have you by my side for the rest of our lives. Please forgive me.

The Sacrifices I Made

2009-11-13T23:05:00.000-05:00

I am sorry I lied. I am sorry that you can't see how much you mean to me. Yes, it was wrong. But it was also something that didn't need to break us apart.

I'm sorry you refuse to give me another chance. I'm sorry you refuse to try and learn to trust me again. I'm sorry that you're throwing away something beautiful and don't want to truly work at it.

I'm sorry I didn't work harder but I'm also sorry that you didn't see all the sacrifices I made for us. You just wouldn't let yourself acknowledge that I was putting in just as much work for us as you were.

I'm sorry.

To Jamie and Nicholas

2009-11-12T23:04:00.000-05:00

I am sorry that I broke a promise, I lied, I yelled, I blamed someone else, thinking that sorry would fix it. Your my friends and you guys really do mean a lot to me. Sorry Jamie and Nicholas.

-M

Cancer is Enough on its Own

2009-11-12T23:03:00.000-05:00

im sorry for not visiting you sinse you started treatment. im sorry that i add to the pain. cancer is enough on its own. im sorry i avoid you everyday and i am scared to see you. i love you. i wish i had you in my life. you are my godmother, neighbor, and friend. i feel so bad and i cant stop thinking about you. i am completely ashamed. i think about you always. i know you will get better. i am sorry i have ruined our relationship and let you believe that i don't care. im sorry that we wont ever be the same. im sorry you dont have my support. you are truely unbelieveable in every aspect. im sorry. im sorry. im sorry.

That I Fall for You Every Time

2009-11-12T23:02:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry that I fall for you every time I see you.

For Giving Up Now

2009-11-11T23:01:00.000-05:00

I’m sorry I couldn’t be perfect.

I’m sorry I couldn’t love you.

And I’m sorry for giving up now.

The "B" Word

2009-11-09T22:59:00.000-05:00

To the lady I called the "B" word yesterday at Safeway, I am sorry. I was peeved about your honking for the main reason that I was reversing from a handicap space and you came flying by and started honking. I still think that you need to slow down in parking lots but i am truly sorry that i called you that name.

The Wonderful Times of Our Past

2009-11-05T22:58:00.000-05:00

Sometimes we forget the wonderful times of our past. Like going deer hunting in the grove with only one ammo. Dancing under the light of the moon at the pond. travelling with a sick child and having to hose everthing down along the way. Taking off and going to see the gators, kid free and helping the elder man fix his flat tire on the way home. The miniature three wheeler rides at midnight. The bass caught and the gators fought. Bonfires so big and trying to jump over the flames. Fishing and the catfish jumping into the boat, oh and lets not forget our sweet adorable goat. And the tears you cried when the baby calf died. I remember these things and I will always cherish them. I am so so sorry.........

Things That Make Me Feel Bad

2009-11-03T22:57:00.000-05:00

There's a big difference between things I want to apologize for, and what I'm sorry about. I apologize when I see that I've hurt others through my own thoughtlessness or selfishness. I'm "sorry" for all sorts of things that make me feel bad- many of which I don't have a lot of control over. I'm sorry that most people use this site just to vent, rather than take responsibility for their own lives. I apologize for not having enough empathy to understand that sometimes venting is the best we know how to do. I laugh now that I see I'm venting myself, ..and it feels good! Love, J-

About Who I Was

2009-10-31T22:56:00.000-04:00

Im sorry i lied to you about who i was... i hate that i found out you were such a great guy....im sorry i wasnt there for you.
im sorry i fell in love with you

Too Late to Turn Back Now

2009-10-31T22:54:00.000-04:00

I know it may be too late to turn back now but, I am truly sorry. I love you more than anything in this world and I don't understand how I could have put you through this. I guess I've been so afraid that you are going to leave me that I wanted to make sure I wouldn't be alone if it happened.

I admit I was feeling pretty used and unappreciated, maybe even resentful while you had no job and I was flipping the bill for everything. There were just so many factors that pointed me in the direction I chose and it was wrong. Unfortunately, no matter how wrong it was and no matter how many times I apologize and tell you I love you, you have every right in the world not to believe me. I know that because I've been in your position but you know that because you're the one who put me in it.

All I can hope is that in the next few days something will happen and make you see that this is salvageable, we've been through worse... and I still love you.

I will always love you.

When You Were Dying

2009-10-29T22:54:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I didn't acknowledge our love when you were dying. I was so afraid of someone overhearing. When you asked if I remembered how you loved me and wanted me to be with you I panicked. I just blurted out "no".

Please know that I didn't want to hurt your girlfriend or your daughter who were there for you during the illness. I didn't want anyone to think we had had an affair when we didn't (as many times as we wanted to!). I did, and I do, love you.

Truthfully, the void you left is much bigger than I could have predicted. Perhaps in the next lifetime, our timing will be better. You are/were an incredible person and I am lucky to have known you.

Even if You Don't Believe Me

2009-10-28T22:53:00.000-04:00

Im sorry for feeling sorry for myself and taking it out on you. im going to get help now which is hard to admit because it makes my problems real. i'm sorry for putting you through hell these last 2 months but truth is i was going through hell myself and i apologize for trying to shut you out. sorry even if you don't believe me.

I'm Crying As I Write This

2009-10-25T22:51:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that i make you feel the way you do. I'm sorry that i'm not six years old anymore. I'm sorry that i never look you in the eyes when i say i love you. I'm sorry that i don't hug you enough.

But i'm not sorry that i'm crying as i write this.

My Actions and Words

2009-10-25T22:49:00.000-04:00

To whom it may concern,
Hey, I am living with a constant ton of weight on my chest right now, and I wanted to apologize to you for not being the kind of person and/or friend that I am supposed to be. I want to apologize for acting like a dumbass on a regular basis. For not thinking before I speak and act. As if my actions weren't already waaaay below par, I want to apologize for always being around when I know I should be gone. I know this because we have been friends for soo long and I'm not completely stupid, I know what things look like and yet I don't listen to my instincts and I stand in your way and hold you back. Man, I really am sorry you guys! Please forgive me, I really want to try and improve on my actions and words.... so, from now on, do not let me be this person I have become. Thank you for being the friend to me that I wish I were to you in return! I want you all to know that I love you all!

Sorry I Gave Up on You

2009-10-24T22:48:00.000-04:00

Im sorry I gave up on you, I had to so I could be a better person to people who want and need me.

Sorry We Haven't Gotten Pregnant

2009-10-22T22:46:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry we haven't gotten pregnant yet babe. I know you make light of it to try and ease my guilt and say that everything's ok, but I still see the longing. I wish my body wasn't broken. Sometimes I wish you'd just go find somebody who could get preggers, because you're going to be such an awesome daddy. I hate the fact that I'm slowly taking that away from you.

I'm sorry it's taken this long and it's bound to take longer. I'm sorry we can't afford the IVF we're probably going to need. I'm sorry I have PCOS, I feel like such a failure, like less a woman.

Thanks for hanging out. It makes it all that much easier to bear.

I'm Sorry Hunny

2009-10-20T22:46:00.000-04:00

I'm so sorry. I ruined everything and I don't know how you could look at me. I'm a terribul person and don't expect you to forgive me. But i'm sorry. And I love you. Your the best thing that ever Happend to me and I fucked it up. I love you. I'm sorry. I promise you, I'll never ever do anything so stupid again, and I'll always think of you when I make decisions. I'm going to be a better person I sware. I'm sorry hunny. I'll be a better person I promise.

The Interrogation

2009-10-20T22:45:00.000-04:00

Sorry my parents interrogated you, I really like you though.

The "I" in "We"

2009-10-20T22:44:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I believed in "we".

Just Because You're Fat

2009-10-19T22:43:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that I stare at you just because you're fat. I'm actually very self conscious and seeing people bigger than me makes me feel better. I'm sure you're a beautiful person.

I'm Your Innocent, Sweet Ex-Girl

2009-10-18T22:41:00.001-04:00

I'm sorry I'm lying even while telling the truth. I'm sorry I manipulate all the people around me. I'm sorry I'm not who anyone thinks I am. To you, I'm your daughter. you have the best idea of who I am, someone who loves and hates viciously, sarcastically. Someone who is smart and funny while insecure and afraid. I'm sorry I drain you of all your money. You don't know all the times I've lied and lied and lied. I've lied to you about being high and drunk while being high and drunk. I've lied about where my scars came from and I'm sorry.

To you, I'm your innocent, sweet ex-girl. You don't know the things I've called you behind your back and I'm so sorry for saying them.

To you I'm your best friend and I'm becoming something you don't respect or even like and I know it hurts your feelings.
I'm your sister, and to you I'm sorry more than anyone else, because all you have ever done is love me and care about me. I push you away and hurt you, and I'm sorry.

I am living regret and guilt every day. I'm sorry for those I hit turning around.

Something a Little Stronger

2009-10-15T14:48:00.000-04:00

im sorry Lisa.

im sorry i do our job better than you. im sorry i dont feel the need to try and get with an old man for his money. im sorry im not a lesbian and i didnt want you.

im sorry you quit and it wasnt because of me. im sorry your supporting three dead-beats on a waitress income. im sorry you ever thought i "knew" you. to tell you the truth i never hurd a word you said.

and last but not least, im sorry that you thougt i was a bitch...

i was going for something a little stronger.

Emotional & Psychological Traumas

2009-10-13T14:47:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for passing on my emotional/psychological traumas to you. I'm sorry I didn't know how to break the chain. I pray that you are able to.

I'm sorry I want to dredge up old pain for you in order to get past it myself.

I'm sorry if my not talking about it has made you feel I've gotten over the painful memories we share, forgotten them, or don't want to think about it.

That I Have a Bad Temper

2009-10-12T14:45:00.001-04:00

I'm sorry that I have a bad temper.I'm sorry that I can't always forgive and forget.I'm sorry that I always take out my anger on the wrong people.I'm sorry that every guy I have ever began to love stabs me in my heart.I'm sorry I sound so depressing.I'm sorry that I have different views than everyone in this small useless town.I'm sorry that I don't always look good,even though I do try.I'm sorry that my depression comes and goes.I truley cannot help it.I just want out of here.A new life.New people..

My Chemistry Teacher

2009-10-12T14:45:00.000-04:00

I am sorry for making fun of my chemistry teacher, but she is crazy!

p.s.- and i am sorry for saying she is crazy right then...

Too Religious

2009-10-12T14:44:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for believing you loved me for me,
and most of all i'm sorry for being TOO RELIGIOUS!
Whatev..
live with that R... N.....

To the Person I Cut Off

2009-10-12T14:43:00.000-04:00

to the person i cut off while driving yesterday - i am truly sorry. i don't know what i was thinking. i do not usually drive that recklessly.

What I'm Passionate About

2009-10-11T14:42:00.000-04:00

i'm sorry that what i am passionate about is so offensive to you.

How to Please You

2009-10-11T14:40:00.001-04:00

I'm sorry that I'm 27 years old and have yet to figure out how to please you. I'm sorry that when you're around you make me feel foolish. I'm sorry I like myself until you show up to tell me something is wrong with me. I'm sorry this is making me cry. I'm sorry you've pissed me off and now I'm sitting here on the internet trying to find an answer to you and to us. I'm sorry that when you're around I get confused about myself and let the things you say affect me. I'm sorry we don't have it like other mom and daughters. I'm sorry that you don't know how much this all hurts me. I'm sorry you really honestly just think I'm a selfish bitch. I'm sorry my future children will never really know you because you never really knew me. I'm sorry more importantly that my husband has to see all of this. It's embarrassing. I'm sorry that for so long I thought something was wrong with me. I'm sorry I have no confidence and thought I needed help for my depression. I'm sorry that I realized it was your fault. I'm sorry you've screwed me up even without beating me as a child and by giving me everything I ever wanted you still managed to screw it up. That's amazing. On the other hand...I am not sorry I don't make my bed as grown adult. I am not sorry I don't go to your mega church. I am not sorry I have two big stinky dogs and a shitty job and don't own a home. I don't care if the laundry isn't done. I am not sorry for tattoos and using 'foul' language. I don't care if you think I'm selfish. I don't care if you think I'm dirty. I don't care if you cry for me. What a waste of your time. I'm happy. I'm okay. I'm spiritual. I'm political. I'm faithful. I'm thoughtful. I'm creative. I'm not crazy. Fuck you! The End.

When I Was 14

2009-10-08T14:39:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that I listened to you when i was 14 years old and took your advice in leaving school to help you guys support the family. That was my fault I should have been stronger and ran away from home.So that i could make my own decisions in life and follow the path i was trying to make for myself and continue my studies.Maybe now we wouldn't be in so much shit and maybe we would have money if i had just followed my own dreams and ambitions instead of letting you put me down and listening to you reject my ideals for a better future.

The Last Three Years

2009-10-08T14:38:00.000-04:00

I am sorry to have put you through the last three years. All the hopes and dreams that have kept you excited for life, kept you dreaming - put on hold. I hope that now I can get back on track and live those dreams as I intended all along.

To Brother and Half Brother

2009-10-07T14:38:00.000-04:00

Brother and Half Brother,
Thank you for being truthful with me. And Half Brother, thank you for letting me meet you. You are one of the best things that could of ever happened to me.

I'm sorry for ever doubting you; ever thinking of the two of you as enemies. I think I finally realize that I was my own enemy. Thanks again

Love,
Little Sister

That This is So Complicated

2009-10-07T13:35:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry...I'm sorry that this is so complicated, I'm sorry that she will never understand, I'm sorry most others will never understand, I'm sorry that being your friend causes so much trouble for you. I'm sorry I promised to never give up...because right now I see no other way to end this madness. I'm not sorry I love you, I'm not sorry I want you to be happy, I'm not sorry we hold so much potential. But I will never, ever hurt you or her on purpose...ever! I don't know what else to say but I'm sorry.

Please Come Back Joe

2009-10-06T13:34:00.001-04:00

Joe, I am sorry you have not been keeping up with this site...It really is a shame because this is the only site where we can truly write what we feel and our apologies can be seen for those we apologize to and others.Please come back Joe and let this site be again!!!

I'll Tell You One Day

2009-10-06T13:34:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for looking at porn when i was only ten. I'm sorry for stopping at 14. I'm sorry I lied, said I hated you, tried to run away and commit suicide, I'm sorry for lying about cutting her hair, my hair, and for watching r rated movies at 12, sorry for thinking about becoming a lesbian, masturbating, and for using this website instead of saying it to your face. I'll tell you one day.

That You Don't Know for Sure

2009-10-06T13:33:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that you don't know for sure that I'd be your partner now...5 months from now, 5 years from now.

Careless

2009-10-05T13:33:00.000-04:00

Sorry that i never cared!

Hater

2009-10-03T11:56:00.000-04:00

im sorry for being a hater

But Yet Fruit of Love

2009-10-02T11:56:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for not wanting you...

Not the right time, not enough money...but yet fruit of love.

Will always keep you in my heart...

Forgive me.

You're a Questionable Character

2009-10-01T11:55:00.000-04:00

I once told you I'd love you forever, so very long ago, and I still do. My feelings for you are complicated though, and I think I'd rather not talk to you again. Sometimes, I wonder what it would be like if we could've just gotten along... I know you think I was just playing games with you, but that's not the case. It's just, you're a questionable character. You confuse me, or maybe I confuse myself -- my feelings for you are just very awkward altogether. Without you, I don't think I would ever have been this happy. I don't even know if I'd be alive. If it weren't for you, I know I wouldn't want to be. You challenged me to live in a new way, to think in a new way, and the lessons you taught me are still with me today. I will never forget you. I do love you. But you feel... destructive. You aren't good for me and I'm sorry that's how it is. I'm sorry I can't even talk to you anymore.

Consumed By Jealousy

2009-09-29T11:54:00.000-04:00

Im sorry im a awful person

Im sorry that im consumed by jealousy over how pretty you are and wish that you'd be ugly.

Im sorry how i try to make you jealous by name dropping.

Im sorry for dismissing you're problems when you confide in me.

Im sorry for each and every spiteful thing im say.

Im sorry for the dirty looks i give you when you glance my way.

I just want to let you know you are indeed the person i value most.

Im just trying to simply say sorry for being a crap bestfriend.

I Went Crazy

2009-09-27T11:53:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I went crazy and disregarded your feelings.

Don't Forget Your Little Sister

2009-09-26T11:51:00.000-04:00

I am sorry for being excited for you when you told me that you were moving out. Your my sister, my pyscologist, my cook, my comedian, my stylist, my only sane family member, and my best friend. I don't know what I will do with out you here. Don't forget your little sister when your moving on with your life.

Before You Died

2009-09-25T11:50:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry mom that I didn't ask you more questions about your youth before you died. I'm sorry I didn't visit you over the summer before you were gone. I'm sorry I didn't do more for you.

Everything I Do for Us is Never Enough

2009-09-21T13:30:00.000-04:00

I am sorry that I feel like everything I do for us is never enough. How can a husband and a wife be so distant from one another, and expect the marriage to blossom? I feel trapped, I feel suffocated, and I feel neglected on so many levels. A marriage is not based on one persons needs, it is based on both. You cannot honestly tell me that you do not feel like we have drifted apart. We do not have anything to talk about to one another, we do not do things together, or as a family. And almost everything we do, evolves around your interest, and yours alone. Where do I count, where do I fit in? I am so alone all the time, even though you may be right beside me watching tv, or lying in the bed. Everyone says go get a job, meet new people, find something to occupy your time, I do not think this will cure the emptiness I have inside. My emptiness stems from the lack of interest that is put in our marriage, not from the outside world. I am sorry I do not know how mych longer I can do this!!

For Dancing with Other Guys

2009-09-20T13:22:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for dancing with other guys right in front of you. I thought we were over and I was so upset. You didn't deserve that and I would go back if I could and change everything. Now that we are trying to work it out it is ten times harder because of one stupid choice I made. I made a bad choice and I will suffer the consequences. Hopefully one day this will all seem so small. I love you always.

Financial Ruins

2009-09-20T13:21:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that I still hate you both for ripping me off for all those millions. I've tried really hard to forgive you for financially ruining me. I'm sorry I believed all your lies when you were convincing me that your wife had cancer so that I wouldn't put pressure on you to do your job properly, and instead you were using my compassion to deflect me away from finding out what you were really doing. I'm sorry that I still want to see you go to prison. I'm sorry that you've tried to suicide by overdose five times so that you may get your court case dismissed. I'm sorry that you keep failing. I'm sorry that I just won't give up until I get justice. I'm sorry that I will never forgive you for stealing my holiday of a lifetime which had to be cancelled once I found out your crime. I'm sorry I gave you both jobs, trained and cared for you, and gave you the opportunity to ruin my life....

Don't Stand So Close to Me

2009-09-18T13:20:00.000-04:00

to my teacher,

i apologize for secretly loving you...

And I'm Sorry for Feeling It

2009-09-18T13:19:00.000-04:00

Tim,

You don't know me. Well, we see each other at school and you are friends with my friends but you don't personally know me.

Anyway.

I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU. And I don't care how much it seems pathetic and mushy and ridiculous.

I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU. Yes I know you have a girlfriend and I have no intentions of ruining your relationship with her.

I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU. I am not asking for you to love me back cos aside from it is impossible, I am already satisfied just by looking at you from afar.

I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU. And I am sorry for feeling it.I am sorry for secretly staring. I am sorry for fantasizing about you at night.

Mai

Even After Two Years

2009-09-17T13:18:00.000-04:00

I am sorry that I may never be able to fully trust you… even after two years. You are great almost all the time. I just wish I could trust you with other girls, but after December I know I can’t. I have tried. I really have. I am sorry that I do not have enough trust in you to put all my faith in you… I love you, but I don’t know if that is enough anymore and I am sorry, because I want it to be. I am sorry.

Believed That You Really Cared

2009-09-14T13:16:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I trusted myself to you. I'm sorry I put me out there on the line, shared my dreams and visions...believed that you really cared. I'm sorry that it made you laugh, because then I had to see that it was valueless to you. I'm sorry that no matter what I do or what I say...you don't seem to know me. I'm sorry you don't understand and don't want to.

Things are Going to Change

2009-09-11T13:14:00.000-04:00

Dear Me:

I am sorry for not loving you enough,

for putting you through the ringer,

for allowing others to tear chunks at your self worth & self esteem

for not listening to your soul when it was hurting and warning you

for not putting you on a pedestal, making you a priority and making you the cornerstone of my existance

things are going to change, I give you my word

From Yet Another Girl on Your List

2009-09-10T13:13:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for falling in love with you....I'm sorry for giving you my all.....I'm sorry for trying things with you that I knew were wrong,(I just wanted to be apart of your world)....I'm sorry for allowing you to beat me(broken hand a day before my birthday).....I'm sorry for allowing you to verbally abuse me in front of my son's and your daughters.....I'm sorry for staying when you cheated on me while I was carrying your only son.....I'm sorry for caring the full load of being a parent to our son....I'm sorry I allowed you to change who I truly was.....I'm sorry for being a fool in love with you...I'm sorry I allowed you to take full control of my spirit.. yours truly lilbigirl aka Ms.cocoabeach or better yet another girl on your list.....

For Settling When it Comes to Love

2009-09-09T13:12:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry to myself for not accomplishing my dreams, putting up with negative people and not talking back.

I'm sorry for settling when it comes to love. Wasting youth on being young :)I'm sorry I don't sleep more.

Sorry Lobster

2009-09-08T13:11:00.000-04:00

Sorry lobster, I saw you steamed and ate you without any hesitation...

But You Said it Anyway

2009-09-07T13:10:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that you knew it would hurt me...but you said it anyway. In the year and half we've worked together I have never, ever intentionally hurt you. I have never used even a sarcastic tone with the staff. I'm sorry this is what you think of me. Or more to the point how little you think of me. I will try to remember my place. I guess it was a little more ego than I like to admit...thinking maybe I was as important to you in this adventure as you are to me.

That I Drink So Much and Cause So Much Pain

2009-09-06T13:09:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that I drink so much and cause so much pain in your lives. Sorry that I make bad decisions. Sorry that I still have not changed.

We've Been Inseparable

2009-09-06T13:08:00.000-04:00

My dear friend,

Through all of these years we've been inseparable. And I swore that I wouldn't do anything to hurt you. Suddenly the spoken word seem so meaningless, pointless. I did hurt you and in fact I still do.

It was never meant to be, never meant to happen but sometimes life can be very unpredictable and I feel like such a lousy friend. I knew you wanted him from the very beginning. I was your shoulder to cry on when he sayed or did things that made you hurt.

This summer we have spent a lot of time with this particular person. And the thing that should not be, well it happened. I somewhere along the way lost my sense of control and fell in love with the very same person you had been adoring for two whole years. I really do like him so it's not just a stupid fling that easily tear friends apart. This feels real, for the very first time.

I went behind your back. The person you loved started to show interest in me and we both are, or I am atleast, terrified of telling you the truth. Telling you that me and him have been spending nights together, doing nothing other than talking and bounding. And I really wish I could take it further but I have to tell you that I'm really sorry first. You're my best friend and I never ever intended to hurt you and the part that kills me is that I didn't stick to my promise; to never hurt you my love.

I'm sorry.

For All I Have Done to You

2009-09-04T13:06:00.001-04:00

i am sorry for all i have done to you. for not being a better person, and for disappointing you like i have disappointed myself. for making you angry, for hurting your feelings,for what i did that ill never be able to forgive myself for. there are just so many things i am sorry for i cant even think of them all right now...but for everything dear friend, i am truly truly sorry..

You B@stard

2009-09-04T13:01:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that Joe Apology doesn't post things with swear words in them. I just typed how I felt at the moment. I'm sorry I swore at you. I was angrier than ever that he left me. I wanted to look back at what I wrote now, that it's been 6 months and I've healed...but you didn't post it. You b@stard.

My Already Giddy Mood

2009-09-02T13:00:00.000-04:00

i'm sorry my already giddy mood made me laugh at your troubles. i hope you didn't judge me for it.

God Damn, That Felt Good

2009-08-31T13:00:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry to everyone I've made fun of. I just do it because I'm a bitter teenager with low self esteem. I laugh when it happens, but later on when I think of what I say to people it really makes me depressed.

I apologize to my father for not being a better son. I smoke weed in his house even though he politely asks me not too. I treat him like shit because of how he treats everyone when he's drunk. It's just the alcohol, though. One night the fighting got really bad and I screamed "I hate your fucking guts, and I'm ashamed to be your son!" I've never seen a sadder look on anyones face. Even though I apologized, our relationship was permanently damaged.

I apologize to my mother and sister. The kindest women I've ever known, and again I take them for granted. All they offer is love and I give bitterness back in return.

I apologize to myself, for giving myself such a hard time. No one is perfect, yet I get bent out of shape anytime I discover a flaw, no matter how small.

God damn, that felt good!

All U Ever Wanted and Needed

2009-08-30T12:51:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for being all u ever wanted and all u ever needed I'm sry u stopped callin me n I had another boy friend at the party and my drunken fren had to tell u wat ur so called frenz already kno. I'm sry I loved u n I'm sry u tried to move on n she left u

That I Couldn't Return Your Love at that Time

2009-08-30T12:49:00.001-04:00

I'm sorry. For everything. I know that you liked me.. I think i knew you liked me before you knew you liked me.
I use to read your journal before i had ever even met you. I knew the day we were introduced there is more story here that i was ready for. Before you went to LA is when i really realized that I might like you. I am/was insecure and told no one. You came home and I realized I might love everything about you. So i started looking for flaws. I dont know why i was so scared to tell people i loved you. I made little things into fights, I tried to be mean to you and to get you to not love me anymore. In reality i still read your blog and wrote about you. I still do.

My apology is that I couldnt return your love at that time. I know it was my fault and it was my shortcomings that stopped us from being happy together.

My apology is that i was never able to tell you why we didnt get our happy ending.

Im sorry and I miss you.

I hope she makes you happy.
Amy

To Hailey

2009-08-29T12:48:00.000-04:00

Hailey I'm so sorry for everything - the making fun of you and now this....please forgive me I've only done these things to make you laugh please forgive me

But I Love Him Too, Perhaps More

2009-08-26T12:47:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry you love me. I resent you for telling me you do. I would have been fine without knowing that. I could have gone home to the man I loved and continued with our family. You told me though and that changed everything. For months I wanted to be yours and I simply accepted it wouldn't be, then with less than 24 hours until my departure of the place you and I had lived in pretty close quarters together you confessed your love for me. I came home and broke the heart of the man I had loved for nearly a decade because of that. I was scared to be back where he was after being apart for months and months, but after you told me that, things could never be the same again. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to tell you, I love you too, but this won't work. You'll be here and I'll be there and there's someone at home who loves me a lot. The thing that I'm the most remorseful for is the fact that 3 months ago I told him I missed him, that I had made a mistake. I don't know if it was just seeing him again after months or what but I truly felt that. Not even a week later I slept with him. To be brutally honest and fair though, I've been sleeping with him all summer. You go off on jealous rages when I tell you that I've even spent time with him so I can't imagine the response if I were to tell you all this. I do love you, but I love him too, perhaps more. Regardless I don't know how much longer I can do this. It weighs on my soul.

That He's Yours

2009-08-26T12:44:00.000-04:00

Im sorry that you stole my boyfriend. im sorry that i called you a whore. im sorry that he cheated on me. but most of all, im sorry that hes yours.

I Am Sorry I Broke Your Arm

2009-08-25T12:42:00.000-04:00

I am sorry I broke your arm and blamed it one of the other clients in the home. It creeped me out that I would walk into your room and you'd be standing in front of the mirror, naked, looking at yourself. I was jealous of the size of your penis. You were so mentally retarded you didn't even know what to do with it. So I felt justified in hitting you, knowing full well that you would remain docile, would not hit back. You could barely talk so I didn't have to worry about you telling the head nurse. They threw the scapegoat out of the home for fear that he would hurt someone else. And I kept my job, though you may have noticed that I was a little less rough on you. Time has changed me, mellowed me out, and so I realize that I was a conduit for evil in those days and I'm sorry you had to get hurt by it, just because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. I hope you'll forgive me, if you remember me at all. And I suppose that would be best, huh?

3 Apologies

2009-08-25T12:41:00.000-04:00

1. I'm sorry for using a racial slur against you in grade 4. I did not know any better.

2. I am sorry for not being more considerate of your feelings when we used to meet in the morning before work.

3. I am sorry for not having kept closer contact with all my old friends.

From a Suckish Person

2009-08-24T12:39:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry. I don't even know who I should be saying this to. I'm just sorry. I'm sorry that I feel at least a little bit of hatred for everyone I know, even my family. I'm sorry that I'm an all around suckish person.

That I Lead You On

2009-08-24T12:38:00.000-04:00

Im so sorry that I let him finger me. I should have just gotten up and told him to stop. Im sorry you were in the room, Im sorry that it was obvious what was going on. Im sorry I don believe you that he bragged about it. Im sorry that you like me and Im just not attracted to you. Im sorry that I flirt with all your friends in front of you. Im sorry that I lead you on. Again and again. Im sorry that no matter how bad I mess up I ask you to forgive me, and you do. You deserve better than me, and I hope someday you realise that.

When You Had a GF

2009-08-23T12:37:00.000-04:00

im sorry that i still love you.
im sorry that you moved away.
but im not sorry that we fucked when you had a gf.

To My 3rd Grade Teacher

2009-08-21T12:36:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry i kicked you in the leg, but i couldn't reach your face back then.

As I Have for the Longest Time

2009-08-20T12:35:00.000-04:00

I'm so sorry I ignored you. You're my best friend but I want to be more and I'm sorry you can't see it. I told you I needed to be alone to concentrate on writing, but that wasn't entirely true. I love you, and I know I can't tell you because you don't feel the same, and it would ruin our friendship by making it awkward. I truly am sorry for not talking to you for a while and not being the best friend that you say I am. I love you, as I have for the longest time. I'm sorry.

Everything is Useless

2009-08-20T12:33:00.000-04:00

I am sorry for mysel. I have loved him for 2 years and I can't forget him. Everything is useless. I would never find out what he thinks about me. Probably nothing.

I Don't Think You Changed

2009-08-17T12:33:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that i messsed up and ended our friendship. Honestly, I don't think you changed, I think i just started to see who you were. I'm sorry i couldn't make you see how you treat people, and i wish I had not let you do what ever you wanted. I'm sorry I couldn't be honest with you, and I'm sorry we can't be friends.

A Record Player, a Heart

2009-08-17T12:32:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry i broke your record player.
You broke my heart.

It's Not My Fault I'm a Slut

2009-08-14T12:31:00.000-04:00

Im so sorry i act like your bestfriend, but I dont really like you. Im so sorry i'd rather be friends with them. Its not my fault i used to be popular. And it's not my fault im a slut.

Me and My Hand and My Vag

2009-08-13T12:27:00.000-04:00

Dear laptop,

We're sorry that we abuse you to look at free porn while masturbating...EVERY DAY.

We can only imagine what you think of us. But don't lie, it kinda turns you on, doesn't it?

-Me and my hand and my vag

I Know it's Bad of Me

2009-08-13T12:26:00.000-04:00

i'm sorry that after 4 months the only reason i'm talking to you is because i heard you met someone. i know it's bad of me. : (

sorry i'll never apologise to your face.

I Can't Be the Leader You Want Me to Be

2009-08-11T12:22:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I can't be the leader you want me to be. I'm sorry that I try my hardest and try to do everything right and still end up not living up to your standards. I'm sorry I try to push the petty BS aside and take care of the bigger issues that we are faced with. I'm sorry that I have failed you as a leader. Only 5 more months then you will never see me again.

That I Didn't Pursue You

2009-08-11T12:20:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry that I didn't pursue you years ago. I'm sorry that I went the more convenient route. I've always had feelings for you, and now I fear I'm in too deep and it's too late. I still love you. I want to be with you, but I'm scared. You are on my mind daily. I'm sorry I married him.

Jealous, Selfish and All the Rest

2009-08-09T12:19:00.000-04:00

i am sorry that sometimes i get jelous. i am sorry that sometimes i feel selfish, i am sorry that i believe in different things that you dont believe in, i am sorry that i have been a bad friend in the past, i am sorry that not everything i say turns out right, I am sorry that i get annoying, i am sorry that i am over protective, i am sorry that scared of not just one thing but everything, i am sorry that i care what others think of me, i am sorry about my short temper, i am sorry that i stress a lot about my problems even though other people in the world have worse, i am sorry that sometimes i ask for a little too much, I am sorry that theres so much that i should do but i dont do, I am sorry that i am alive even though others die every second, I am sorry that i get confused sometimes, and i am sorry that i feel sometimes that i am a waste of life and shouldn't be on this earth and should give my life to someone who needs it more than i do.

The Rubberband

2009-08-06T12:16:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I hit you in the eye with a rubberband. IT WAS AN ACCIDENT !!!!!!

I Think You're Fat and Ugly

2009-08-05T00:35:00.000-04:00

Dear Me,

I'm sorry I think you're fat and ugly.
That you will never measure up.
That you will never be happy with what you have and who you are.

I'm sorry I'm not proud of you.
That I don't believe in you.
That I don't think anyone will ever love you.
That my negativity holds you back.

I wish we could find a way to get along.
That we can work things out.
Every time we get close to resolving things,
All it takes is for you to stand in front of a mirror
And I hate you all over again.

For my blindness,
For never loving you,
For my hate
I'm sorry

I'm Sorry You Can't Understand I Fell in Love

2009-08-05T00:34:00.000-04:00

Te pido perdón papá porque esto no es lo que tu esperabas de mi, te pido perdón porque me enamore de un hombre hermoso, que me sabe amar y cuidar. También te pido que entiendas que eh crecido y quiero empezar una vida junto a el. Perdoname por no ser una hija ejemplar. Perdoname porque la gente no saber callar sus opiniones y te asen sentir mal cuando hablan de mi frente a ti. No les hagas caso, lo asen por no tener mejor que hacer. Yo te quiero mucho y eres el mejor de los papas. Me as ensenado morales que no cualquiera sabe, por ti soy la persona que soy, fuerte y feliz.
Te quiero mucho papá, y quiero que sepas que lo ago por mi. Ojala un día me entiendas.

Por hoy, te pido perdón por hacerte sufrir.

Too Young to Understand

2009-08-05T00:33:00.000-04:00

I am sorry I've always been "too young" to understand.
I am sorry you can't trust me.

I always thought of you as my big sisters. I believed you'd love me and trust me above all because we are from the same blood. I never thought gaining your trust would be so much hard work; I didn’t know trust and all its wonders didn’t come easy.
I remember like it was yesterday, a year ago I asked you to confide in me, I said to you we should work on building a better relationship for our own sake. I told you that I loved you and I needed you in my life, you looked at me and laughed and proceeded to tell me you could never trust me.

Why??

What have I ever done but want my big sisters love and support.

In my heart I know I've never done anything to hurt you or lead you to think you couldn’t talk to me as a friend. Besides the fact that you don’t trust me, I still love you, I still think one day you WILL be the 2 best big sisters I could ever want, but as of now, I can’t help but be sorry.

I am sorry you can’t trust your little sister.

That My Love Brings So Much Pain

2009-08-03T00:30:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry everything dont go the way you wish it would...
I'm sorry I hurt you so much..
I'm sorry i'm so negative..
I'm sorry tht my love brings so much pain...

To the Waitress at Friday's

2009-08-02T00:29:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I was such a bitch yesterday to you. I was PMSing and hungry and having quite a bitchy day. I should have been more patient with you. I'm very sorry if I made your day more difficult. Good luck in your future endeavors with terrible customers.

-Meanie

So I Could Keep You Longer

2009-07-28T00:29:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry I made you stay in class just so I could keep you longer.

I Wish I Can Love You Unconditionally

2009-07-27T00:28:00.000-04:00

i wish i can love you unconditionally...

partly i am afraid we wont work out all the way when you see my weaknesses... and i will have to suffer at that time..

i really want to cheer you up..

i want to see the smiling you..

i want to see the happy you..

please be happy...

For the Dry Tears I Cried

2009-07-26T00:26:00.000-04:00

Im sorry I made you fall so deeply in love with me.
Chased after you for all three years.
then i uped in left you like you should have done me. Im sorry i never was the good girl you thought of me as. i never was just your lil one but his and hers too. i never though it was realy going to effect you. im sorry you thought i was just your girl when you acted like you never gave a damn or never wanted to show attion i found one of your friends who did. ya best friends ya team mates to please dont look at me as a hoe cause all i wanted was you to love me like i loved you. but you had to have it your way and i had to live by your rules and that change sweet lil me to whos ever would b. late nigth convos with who knows who, just the simple fact that i lied to you. three years of lies you pick now cus im sorry for the dry tears i cried.

Everyone Can Love But Me

2009-07-24T00:25:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry, I'm too selfish.
I'm sorry, I don't have the strength to succeed
I'm sorry, I shut everyone out
I'm sorry, I'm restless

But most of all I'm sorry 'cause it feels like everyone can love but me

I'm Sorry I Don't Think Before I Talk

2009-07-23T00:24:00.000-04:00

I kno I say some messed up thimgs. Some of them aren't meant to hurt yu.And the ones that are I say out of anger.I want yu to be able to come to me about anything. I knop im really insensitive and it's just sorta hard for me to be the sensitive type of girlfriend.I just dont wanna have this arguement over again. I Love You with every part of my heart.Please Forgive Me