Peace

I'm sorry I can't talk to you; I'm sorry I'll never have the guts to tell you how I really feel, and what I think. I'm sorry I said yes to you, and that we got engaged. I'm sorry I haven't talked to you in 5 months. I'm sorry that I still love you and I can't stop thinking about you. I fell in love with you, thinking you would be there for me - you weren't.

You live so far away, but I thought we could figure that out as we went. You never talked to me, and now that it comes down to it I can't talk to you. I'm afraid if I do, I will tell you I want you back. I'm sorry to my new boyfriend, who will never understand why I can't trust that he'll be there for me, or why I still have nightmares and am afraid of the dark. I'm sorry I'm so weak, and emotional. I've never believed watching those stupid reality shows on tv that you can not only love, but be in love with more than one person at a time. Boy was I WRONG!!

It is entirely possible, and absolutely horrible. I'm sorry I'm not sure of the decision I would make if my fiancee was here, and available for me to hug. I'm sorry I take marriage very seriously, and look at engagements as a promise of marriage. You broke my trust though, and I'm sorry I am static and cannot resume my life.

I love you, and him, and not myself. I'm sorry.